Note: random google image - not something I actually did personally. I did take some photos of ingredients and a plate of cooked food and all, only they are still on my camera somewhere. I'll add them later once I
a) remember, and
b) work out how to do that.
So, you want to make Peri Peri Chicken? Don't feel like stuffing around with all the BBQ? Maybe it is winter in the Can or Siberia or something and it is minus twenty gazillion outside. Or maybe you are fundamentally lazy. Or maybe the house is surrounded by crazed psychopaths or a SWOT team with maybe a hostage negotiator.
Not a problem - follow me. If you are in the Can, you can also employ this technique in January where for exactly 3 days it stops being minus whatever and converts to about 50 million degrees centigrade, and you are aware of the hole in the ozone layer which has been scientifically proven to stretch across the exact dimentions of the ACT (for US readers, ACT stands for "place where the Can lives").
Peri Peri Chicken! - named after a type of chilli from somewhere. Portugal, North Africa, Chisholm, somewhere like that. Or not. Doesn't matter. They look like the picture anyway.
You assemble the required ingredients. Actually, don't do that. I have written down the recipe at home somewhere, which is a problem because I am at work (obviously) so I will stuff it up and miss out something vital, like cooking the chicken. Let's put a hold on assembling the ingredients until I can get home and find the recipe.
Not to worry. What I do recall is that you go buy 2 Poussin. Or more. I'm thinking in terms of cooking for 2, and factoring in the need to have a few spare mouthfulls to hurl at the cat to stop him yodelling as you eat.
So, what I am actually saying is aim for 1 Poussin per person. If you are buying 4 Poussin, that would be for 4 people. And possibly a yodelling cat. If this is the case and you have got a hold of 4 Poussin, you need to double the other ingredients. That would be the ingredients listed on the post that I haven't actually posted, or indeed written, at this stage. Doesn't matter. Get out of my face. Have you tried to keep your blog updated? No? Then shuddup.
Poussins. You can buy them at markets or in some of those shops that specialise in all kinds of chicken (the ones that have those nasty skewers with horrible peanut butter flavours that nobody has been seen purchasing in the history of the specialist chicken shop era - which says something disturbing about how long the produce has been left there).
Or Coles. Yes - Coles do Poussin. In fact, I think I bought my Poussin for this recipe from Coles which makes for the ideal demonstration of how it is possible to buy Poussin from Coles. They do sell Poussin at Coles, generally in that new sort of yuppy section with stuff called "Game" which includes Roo (genuine game produce) and other stuff that doesn't qualify as Game unless you are the sort of person who likes to do a spot of rifle-range practise in a battery farm.
Poussin isn't Game - suck it up, Coles - it is freaking poultry.
BTW - when you go to Coles to find your Poussin - or practically any other place that sells Poussin in Australia, the Poussin will almost certainly be labeled "Spatchcock". They do this because they are totally wrong. Again - as with displaying your Poussin in the "Game" section. They may not be aware about the Poussin / Spatchcock thing. Even if they are aware, they don't care. I am right saying Poussin.
Coles is wrong.
For the record - a Poussin is a baby chicken generally sold around 400-500g in weight. I forget how old it is when it reaches the weight. Stephanie Alexander would probably know. Give me a break why don't you? What's your problem? Go ask Stephanie since you care so badly, and quit hassling me! Less then a minute ago you probably thought a baby chicken was a Spatchcock - which is totally wrong.
Spatchcock is something totally different, although is a technique frequently employed on Poussin. Or other winged things. Though probably not bats, or dragonflys. Later we are going to "spatchcock' the Poussin. Though not yet because I am not ready and it might be a bit frozen or something.
When you get your Poussin home, put them in the fridge. If they are frozen, apparently you should defrost them in the fridge rather than out on the bench or under a running tap or whatever, otherwise you could potentially get some sort of deadly bacteria that lives in partially defrosted chickens, or possibly running taps - I forget. Whatever. I personally have consumed heaps of chicken defrosted in dodgy circumstances. And I even ate frequently at that kebab shop that used to be in Civic in 1990 something where you could get a donner kebab, chips and coke for under $5 until it was closed down by FSANZ (the acronym stands for something that means government body that closes down dodgy food places). I'm still alive. However, for legal reasons I feel compelled to advise you that it would be better to defrost your Poussin in the approved fashion.
If you must defrost things in a risky manner and not using the approved in-fridge technique, use the mircowave. That's what I do. I don't actually turn it on, I just leave meat in the microwave to defrost with the door shut to avoid Fang (cat-boy - superfangs) leaping on the cupboard and mangling whatever is up there.
Now you have your defrosted Poussin. Good for you. Only I am shagged out now and probably need to get on with some vitally important government business or something. Or have a cigarette. I'll do that first.
So - to be continued in next blog where I will include all ingredients and provide a step by step guide to spatchcocking. Better still, I'll find a link to a YouTube site which shows you how to do it properly (I certainly can't).
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